%@#*&

Crap.
I have to have knee surgery. Again.
20 years ago when I was 19, I was in a bar dancing with a guy. We got a little silly and he dipped me. I fell to the floor like a stone. At first people thought I was kidding, then my friend took my head and looked at my face and said,
"Crap, she's not kidding!"
I had to be carried to my friend's car. Then we had to quickly stop at White Hen to get some gum. Hey, we were 19, we thought we could totally snow the ER doctor that our breath didn't smell like beer. No no, that's just the new Trident flavor there.
Then we got to the ER. They treated us like a couple of drunken teenagers. We waited and waited. Pretty soon my foot started to hurt. I took my shoe off and realized it was swollen. When I got into the exam room for the Dr. to look at me, I finally saw my knee. It was huge! I couldn't even put my jeans back on because my knee was so big. Luckily my friend had an extra skirt in her car (don't ask) so I just had to go home without a shoe.
I was told I dislocated my knee and it wasn't going back in right. Thank God I was drunk because the way that doctor was wrenching my knee back and forth, I almost passed out.
But I figured I'd be fine. No, I couldn't walk on it and needed crutches and couldn't find any shoes or pants to fit because of the swelling, but I'd be OK.
The next day after the bone doctor got a look at my X-rays I got a call. I would not be OK. I needed surgery. The very next day.
Crap.
It was the worst pain I had even been in. My leg was black and blue from my hip to my toes. I ended up on crutches for three months and physical therapy for six. I have had swelling and pain ever since. But I never got it checked out because I never wanted to be in that much pain again.
But my doctor told me that if something was really wrong, it's better get it fixed now than wait until I'm 60. So I went to the bone and joint clinic. An X-ray and an MRI show that I have a rather large bone chip floating around my patella causing me much pain and locking up my knee at times. Apparently I needed surgery to remove it.
While I was hyperventilating my husband scheduled the surgery November 20th. I should be off the crutches in 6-8 weeks. This way if we were really going to get our baby this spring I should be completely recovered.
I DO NOT want to do this. I'd rather be in pain for the rest of my life. The swelling isn't that bad. I'll deal with it when I'm 60.
Crap.